What Other Secrets

broken20heart11You have herpes and did not admit it until I caught the disease from you. I wonder what other secrets you keep and ask myself frequently,”what else have you not told me”. The longer intrigue is hidden, the more damaging the truth is when told. G.T.

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…when at last you find someone
to whom you feel you can pour out your soul,
you stop in shock at the words you utter –
they are so rusty, so ugly, so meaningless
and feeble from being kept
in the small cramped dark inside you so long.
From “The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath”
by Sylvia Plath

For No Good Reason

broken20heart11Sometimes I break my own heart then realize it’s of my own doing. You have done nothing. Re-assembling the pieces, I know everything is okay UNTIL the next time my restless mind takes over again. Oh, what torture I put myself through for no good reason. C.T.

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We are often insane with happiness.
We are also very unhappy for reasons
neither of us can do anything about.
Like being separated.
Audrey Niffenegger

Masks

broken20heart11Falling was only the beginning. Loving you is the real journey. I discovered over time you’re not what you presented yourself to be. Instead of kind, tender and considerate, you’re actually self-centered, cruel and callous. I’m not sure how long I can take this. W.P.

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Love takes off masks
that we fear we cannot live without
and know we cannot live within.
James Baldwin

From the Distance

broken20heart11The last thing I want is for you to go, but I know you’re going. You don’t love me like I love you. You’re still searching and don’t really know yet what you need. No words can’t change your mind. There is nothing I can do but let you go and love you from a distance. S.D.

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Fire runs through my body with the pain of loving you;
Pain runs through my body with the fires of my love for you;
Sickness wanders my body with my love for you;
Pain like a boil about to burst with my love for you;
Consumed by the fire with my love for you.
I remember what you said to me;
I am thinking of your love for me;
I am torn by your love for me;
Pain and more pain.
Where are you going with my love?
I am told you will go from here
I am told you will leave me here;
My body is numb with grief;
Remember what I have said, my love
Good bye, my love, good bye.
recited by a Kwakuitl Indian of Southern Alaska

I Feel Dirty & Used

broken20heart11It was just a few nights. You took what you wanted, then dumped me. For you it was casual sex like scratching an itch. For me it was more. I feel dirty & used from giving all of myself to another man who didn’t deserve me. You’d think I’d have learned by now. S.F.

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I’m not supposed to love you,
I’m not supposed to care
I’m not supposed to live my life,
wishing you were there
I’m not supposed to wonder
where you are or what you do
I’m sorry I just can’t help myself,
I fell in love with you.
Anonymous

I Went Too Far

broken20heart11It was stupid to think I could always control myself when I partied and drank too much. The attention of another man felt good. One thing led to another and I went too far. In drunken weakness I traded moments of pleasure for the beautiful life I had with you. J.B.

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I don’t know what to say,
Everything is wrong,
I can’t believe that I was so blind,
Once again I lost my way,
I know that you’re gone,
I know I hurt you deep inside,
Maybe you can’t forget the lies,
I was just a fool, you see,
I know you trusted me…
From the song “I Am Here”
written and sung by Shakira

Very Sad

broken20heart11You have broken my heart. By jumping to conclusions and only seeing things your way your reason for leaving me behind is, in no small measure, a figment of your imagination. The outcome is the same: I have lost my best friend. Very sad. C.B.

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At some point of your life,
you will become aware
that some people can stay
in your heart but not in your life.
Anonymous

It Does Not Matter

broken20heart11Shock still engulfs me. One day you were in love with me. The next you wanted nothing to do with me. There was no doubt within that I loved you, but you leaving made me realize how very deeply I feel about you. It does not matter. You’re gone. L.L.

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Softly as a gentle breeze,
Love crept into my heart
So softly I did not realize
Until we came to part.
‘Twas then that love so suddenly
Grew claws, and without warning
Clamped around my heart and left
Me bleeding and in mourning.
So stunned was I by this attack,
I did not cry out “stay! ”
And, frowning at my silence,
You turned and walked away.
I never knew, until you left,
How much you’d meant to me
And now you’re gone, I guess
Our love was never meant to be.
“Never Meant To Be”
by Earthbound Angel

Inexplicably Intertwined

broken20heart11So much of my life revolved around you. From what time I get up to what I eat; from what I watch on TV to the positions I sleep in; from my plans for the future to how I dress are all inexplicably intertwined with you.  I’ve become lost from losing you. T.G.

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A habit cannot be
tossed out the window.
It must be coaxed
down the stairs
one step at a time.
Mark Twain

Dying With It

broken20heart11Who am I? I don’t know anymore. I used to, but now I don’t. You coming into my life changed me permanently. Now you leaving me behind is changing me even further into someone, something, I don’t like. Love is dying and I’m dying with it. T.G.

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I want to cry
I want to scream
I want to tell you mostly
I hate that I’m so afraid of everything
I hate that you’re the one thing I want the most but can’t have
I hate that you let me go before I got even got to say goodbye
I wish that you would come back to me
I wish I were strong enough to say no to you
I wish I could believe my own lies I use to cover up the pain you left
I need to move on says my head
I need to hold on says my heart
I need to decide says my mind
I envy the way this hasn’t hurt you at all
I envy her
I envy the fact you don’t understand what this feels like at all
I want to hurt you
I want to be with you
I want this nightmare to be over
I wish I could make things they were before you
I wish I could change time
I wish I could change you
I wish I could have hurt you before you hurt me
I wish I would have given you the letter when I wanted
I need you out of my thoughts
I need you out of my heart
I need to start doing things for me
I hate that you used me
I hate that I gave you something I can never have back
I hate that I wasted it with you
I’m tired of hoping aimlessly for you
I’m tired of wanting something I can’t have
I’m tired of hurting me for things that aren’t my fault
I’m sorry I was good enough
I’m sorry I defended you when everyone else was right
I’m sorry I couldn’t make you happy
Funny though how you never once said sorry for hurting me,
for breaking me,
for not loving me.
http://www.familyfriendpoems.com/poem/thoughts-of-the-broken-hearted#ixzz2cqW8r3uV