Looking For Answers

broken20heart1What happened? How much was your fault? How much mine? Which things could I have done differently? What should you have done another way? This is the “looking for answers” game I play. I’m beginning to realize it doesn’t matter. “We” are not more. B.C.

in the wind

You can obsess and obsess
over how things ended-
what you did wrong
or could have done differently-
but there’s not much of a point.
It’s not like it’ll change anything.
From “The Catastrophic History of You and Me”
By Jess Rothenberg

I Just Can’t

You want children. I don’t. You knew it before we got married. Now you say you went ahead believing I’d change in time. It hurts me so deeply to say this, but we need to go separate ways. You deserve to have what you need. I can’t give you a child. I just can’t. I’m sorry. S.S.

Love has features
which pierce all hearts,
he wears a bandage
which conceals the faults
of those beloved.
He has wings,
he comes quickly
and flies away the same.

Who’s to Say…

Pourquoi avez-vous briser mon coeur? Pourquoi?!? I learned French to communicate better with you. I moved to your country so we could be together. I gave you every thing I had. Then after a month you walked away as if it was all nothing.  Did you ever really love me? D.R.

The knife cuts deeply to the core
The spirit bleeds forever more
A pain to last a whole life long
But who’s to say if this is wrong

We loved beside a diamond bay
That flashed the sun in bright of day
And glittered in the starry night
But who’s to say that it was right
Elizabeth Santos

Till One of Us Can’t Take It

Two may love each other yet not be able to live together. You get jealous.  I have difficulty expressing my love. You get raging mad. I don’t like sex often. You do. We’re from different countries. We sleep in separate beds as often as together. Is our marriage doomed? D.F.

… we feel everything but yet we see nothing.
… still we shed tears of promise
… holding on to this love cause our hearts say to stay
… even thought our minds say to let go and move on
… so we stay and hurt each other
… till one of us can’t take it any more.
Adapted from a poem by Kidd

Day By Day

Never will I understand how you could say you were in love with me & the next day say you never were. You chased me for weeks before I’d go out with you. We dated for months before I’d sleep with you. Then after one time you were gone. You sure fooled me and my heart. L.P.

I feel like no one cares
that I can’t continue living
this way.
Because the pain only intensifies
day by day,
and I know I will never have you again.
I wouldn’t wish the pain I’m in
on to my worst enemy.
No one should have to go through this.
So why am I?
Why didn’t you love me?
I gave you everything
And would have given you more.

Some Day…

My heart’s broken; destroyed; stomped on. Whizzed in a food processor. Grated into tiny pieces with a cheese grater. Ripped in two and set on fire. You waited til my birthday to break up. Now I’ll think of this pain on every birthday that follows. Was that your intention? K.M.

Some Day You’ll Cry For Me
Like I Cried For You,
Some Day You’ll Miss Me
Like I Missed You,
Some Day You’ll Need Me
Like I Needed You,
Some Day You’ll Love Me
But I Won’t Love You

With All The Little Pieces

We ignore each other and try to pretend the other person doesn’t exist, but deep down we know it wasn’t supposed to end like this. It’s amazing how someone can break your heart and you can still love them with all the little pieces. V.M.

 For Sale:
One Heart.
Horrible condition.
Will take anything for it.
Just cut it out of my chest
and end this suffering.

My Noon, My Midnight

Why did you say you loved me if you did not want me? Why did you desire me for a time and then no longer? Why did you marry me if you did not want me? And why did you stay with me if here is not where you wanted to be? Why? Why did you take so long to tell me? A.D.

My North, my South
My East and West,
My working week and Sunday rest,
My noon, my midnight,
My talk, my song;
I thought that love
would last forever:
I was wrong.
W. H. Auden

A Hole In The World

Where did I go wrong? What does she do better than me? Do I deserve this? All I do is cry now and want you back even though I know what you did was so very wrong. You have me spinning in circles. Inside I know the truth: you are a pathetic liar and don’t deserve me. J.B.

 Where you used to be,
there is a hole in the world,
which I find myself
constantly walking around
in the daytime,
and falling in at night.
I miss you like hell.
Edna St. Vincent Millay